After moving into our “new” home and wanting to deck it out in all mid century things I’ve turned to a source I had no idea would be so much fun. Of course there’s ebay and etsy to find anything and everything I could ever want but if the item is reasonable, the shipping is outrageous. Sadly, those sites have become way too expensive for me. SO in the last few months I’ve discovered a new and wonderful way to find the items we want for the price we can afford…that being on line yard sale-ing. Between you and me I’ve joined countless ones from my town to as far away as 100 miles. I figure if it’s what I want at a good price, what the hell, I’ll drive to get it. After all who’s not up for an adventure? Well, folks, I have not been disappointed. OK, so maybe I haven’t found all that I’ve wanted and maybe I have been a little disappointed after showing up at a place and discovering the piece of furniture was beyond the repairs I could do. BUT, let me tell you. I have NEVER been disappointed with the adventure.
The first item I wanted was a wonderful slatted bench. Well, wonderful from the picture the owner posted. VERY MID CENTURY! I loved it and the longer it was listed the more I wanted it. The price was perfect too. I mentioned it to my partner but when she didn’t seem interested. I figured I’d let it go. After all someone would give it a good home, right? Well a couple of weeks went by when I noticed a comment by this woman. She was very interested with the bench but wanted to put it outside. OUTSIDE? ARE YOU CRAZY LADY? W-E-L-L that was all I needed to hear and I was going to have that bench. Since this was the first time I had wanted to buy something on the yard sale site, I had assumed it was customary to meet in a public place. After all ANYONE with half a brain knows that’s the safest way. So, you can imagine how I felt when the guy told me to meet at his house. WHAT? REALLY? BUT I don’t know you! You could be an ax murderer! But I wanted the bench! Ax murderer- wanting the bench. OH THIS WAS HARD. I know y’all are thinking this is a no brainer but what y’all don’t know is I am very skilled in finding out almost everything about someone’s background. Before we moved into our new home I looked up everyone in the neighborhood. I knew where most of them worked, if they had kids and information like the kind of dog they have. And so, I figured I wouldn’t panic here. I’d just look this guy up.
I took to the internet doing what I do best. I looked this guy up and after a couple of hours I knew where he worked, that he was divorced with a roughly 6 year old son and had just bought his home. Yes, I do use Facebook but I also use other sources to allow me to cross reference. I also asked this guy questions of the information I knew to see if he was truthful. He was. Even though everything on this guy looked good, I was still nervous. You know what I mean. You’ve seen those TV shows where someone was murdered… they talk to the neighbors about the guy who did it and they say things like, “He was such a nice guy.” Yes, I know. Call me stupid. BUT in my defense I was able to find people I knew who were friends with this guy. Yea, well, I still wasn’t at ease which to the average (SMART) person, they would have said thanks but no thanks. And I knew I was about to do what every law enforcement person tells you to NEVER do. But, dammit! That bench! I WANTED IT!
The morning we were about to leave to look at the bench, we told our son to stay home. We figured it would be safer that way. Yes, I know. DUMB! The best part though was my partner had just had foot surgery and was on crutches. If we had to run, it was not going to be possible.
Before we left the house we gave our son the address where we were going and told him if we didn’t come home in an hour to call the police. Our son was playing video games so he wasn’t really even listening to me. I just knew I was going to die and he was going to spend all day playing video games before realizing it. I know you’re thinking if I am this afraid then just don’t do it. I hear you but THAT BENCH! I wanted it.
As my partner and I were driving to the man’s house I started to panic. No, I wasn’t panicking about the man. Follow me here, folks. I started to panic because I began thinking that maybe this was a nice guy just trying to make a few extra bucks. AND how awful it would be if the police showed up ready to arrest him for abduction or murder. That would be horrible! So, I made my partner call our son to tell him not to call the police.
We made it to the guys house and when we drove up we saw there was a crew of men in his backyard building something. My partner and I had two thoughts. One being that was good to have people there to help us if we needed OR that was bad because maybe they were going to assist this man in his abduction/murder scheme. I didn’t say that out loud though. While I was walking up the walkway and my partner was hobbling she whispered to me she’d use her crutch as a weapon if needed. I told her as long as he didn’t invite us into his bedroom we’d be OK. We laughed.
Just as we got to his front door he opened it. He seemed very nice and invited us inside. The first thing I noticed was how wonderful it was he had his son’s artwork hanging on the walls. BUT I still knew I needed to be cautious. My partner was ready to use her crutch at any moment. After just a minute he invited us to the back of his house where the bench was located. I thought to myself why he didn’t just bring it to the front of the house? Wouldn’t that have been best? Well, it wouldn’t have been for him because he needed to get us good and inside his home before killing us. But of course we went anyway.
Just a few steps and we were in the back of the house. I was thrilled to see the bench. HOWEVER, we could also see the crew in the backyard through the windows. And you know what that meant? If I could see them. They could see us. AND that was proof they were going to help this man kill us. All I could do was hope my partner could pull out some awesome karate moves and use her crutches like I had never seen her use them.
The man directed us to the bench and he began telling us about it. He told us it was his grandmothers. It was so neat and even neater knowing from where it came.. This really was a nice guy just trying to sell an item to make a few bucks. I felt bad for thinking other wise. I gave him the money and was ready to take this awesome bench home. Just as I was going to pick up the bench he stopped me and asked if I would look at another piece of furniture he had. Are you ready where he wanted us to see it? You got it. IN HIS BEDROOM! My partner and I exchanged glances. I know my partner was thinking how in the hell do I get her into these kinds of adventures. I was thinking, “HELLLLLP!” Funny enough, this guy was so ignorantly innocent…he never thought how nervous it all made us and because of that maybe he should have taken the bench to the front lawn to show us. He meant well.
Listen, the fact that I’m writing this story you already know we survived the adventure of the slatted bench. We did indeed follow him into his bedroom. Gosh, we didn’t want to be rude. And he did indeed have a piece of furniture to show us. After showing it to us he graciously took the bench to our car and helped us load it. He was very nice and the farthest thing from an ax murderer. Silly us. Of course we made sure to call our son just as we got into the car letting him know we were safe.
Here’s the bench. It is sitting in our bedroom in all of it’s beautiful wooden glory. Each time I walk by it, I smile. Sometimes I even give out a little chuckle when I imagine if my partner had to work her kung foo magic (with her crutches in hand) to protect us. That vision of my knight in shining armor saving the day makes this slatted bench even more special and well worth our adventure.
Stay tuned for our next adventure!